I am 21 years old and have been with my finance for 5 years now. 9 months ago he was arrested and is now in prison for 5 to 8 years. Each day that i wake up i hope and pray that it will atleast get alittle easier, so far it has not. All i do is cry, literally this has gotten me so depressed. My family does not approve of him and now it has come down to my family and me having no relationship at all. This goes not bother me because of the simple fact that they were never there for me to begin without throughout my whole live. But i have nobody to talk to, i go see a counsilor every week and all she says to me is is this really what i want. This is really what i want i dont care if i have to wait 20 years i love him and i know he loves me. I feel like my heart and soul have been ripped out of me. if anyone can give me strength to get threw this please do. I hope that it gets at least a little easier because i dont know how much more strength i have.

Hi Tabitha,

I won't lie to you by telling you it will get easier. You'll develop coping skills to help you get through it. There's usually someone here you can talk to. We know what you're going through. We're living with it ourselves. Use frequent mail, phone calls and visits to keep your relationship alive. Five to eight years is a long time but some of us are living with either indefinite or life sentences. You can count the days until you'll be together. In the meantime, be good to yourself. Take care of your health. Take an interest in your job and /or education. Keeping busy on positive things helps pass the time and it's a great investment in someone extremely important; you! Write whenever things get overwhelming. Someone will be here for you.

Love,
Donna

IT FEELS SO MUCH BETTER TO JUST KNOW THAT I AM NOT ALONE IN THIS SITUATION. FOR A WHILE I BEGAN TO THINK I WAS NUTS LIKE EVERYONE SAID IF I EVEN THOUGHT ABOUT STAYING WITH ERIK. RIGHT NOW IT IS JUST SO HARD BECAUSE WHERE I AM STAYING AT RIGHT NOW THEY HAVE BLOCKED COLLECTED CALLS AND I HAVE NOT CAR RIGHT NOW, IT CAUGHT ON FIRE. CURRENTLY ERIK IS LOCATED ABOUT 11 HOURS FROM WHERE I AM AT. I TALKED TO HIM YESTERDAY THROUGH A 3 WAY CALL AND I GOT A FEW NUMBERS OF BUSES THAT CAN TAKE PEOPLE UP FOR VISITION. I THINK AND I KNOW IT WILL BE SOO MUCH EASIER ONCE I MOVE FROM WHERE I AM CURRENTLY STAYING. EVERYONE DOES EVERYTHING AND I MEAN EVERYTHING FROM KEEPIN AS A PART. I HONESTLY CAN SAY THAT ERIK IS THE ONLY FAMILY THAT I WANT I DONT CARE IF I HAVE TO NEVER TALK TO MY FAMILY AGAIN BECAUSE I AM ALMOST POSITIVE THAT THAT IS WHAT IT WILL COME DOWN TO. PEOPLE SAY I AM NUTS BUT I KNOW HOW I FEEL AND THE I AM NUTS, BUT NUTS ABOUT HIM.

Hi Tabatha, my name is Barb. I also love a man who is behind bars. I have some friends who are supportive of our relationship and some that are not. I only communicate my relationship issues with those that are. I feel compelled to caution you - please don't write off your family. We can chose our friends, but we only have one family. They're intentions are good, I'm sure. They probably don't know how to handle your situation. Give them time. In the meantime, take care of yourself and take pride in the fact that you have a heart capable of loving this much! Later, Barb

HELLO LADIES..MY NAME IS ANDREA AND I KNOW THE FEELING OF NO SUPPORT..YES, ITS VERY IMPORTANT TO KEEP COMMUINICATION WITH YOUR LOVED ONE AND YOUR FAMILY..MY FAMILY DOESNT APPROVE BECAUSE HE IS BLACK AND NOW THAT HE HAS BEEN INCARCERATED HAS ADDED FUEL TO THE FIRE..YET, I HAVENT GIVEN UP ON MY FIANCE AND MY FAMILY JUST STAYS OUT OF IT NOW..YOU LEARN DIFFERENT WAYS OF DEALING WITH THINGS..FOR ME, 2 BEAUTIFUL LITTLE GIRLS TAKE UP ALOT OF TIME, AND NIGHTS SEEM TO BE THE MOST DIFFICULT AT THIS POINT..HAVENT BEEN ABLE TO ADJUST TO BEING ALONE YET..KEEP AN OPEN MIND AND IF YOU REALLY LOVE EACH OTHER, THINGS WILL WORK OUT THE WAY THEY ARE SUPPOSED TO..COMMUNICATION BETWEEN THE BOTH OF YOU IS REALLY IMPORTANT..FOR YOU AND THEM..

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